Liberty redefined - families, individuals and liberty

This is very clear and timely, and sadly something a lot of Christians are very muddled (or have never really thought) about: https://dougwils.com/books-and-culture/s7-engaging-the-culture/liberty-redefined.html

Your family is your work, and your delight

Ever heard someone say... "because of work, I have little time for family?"

Amongst pastors, ever read one of those book dedications where the author apologises to his family for neglecting them whilst he worked at it? The most "memorable" one such I ever read was at the front of a book on holiness...

According to God, a man's family is his work. You can't neglect your family in favour of your work any more than you can neglect your health for the good of your body, or omit to brush your teeth whilst pleasing your dentist.

I find this thought a big help because the temptation comes to all men. We've started a task or twenty tasks, and then comes an "interruption" - another one! - from family. "How will I ever get the work done", the man wonders. Remembering that the "interruption" is itself his work - his God-given appointment, his holy calling in God's earth - helps us get over mental hurdles. Ultimately God appoints every task we have, and if he's now called us away from one to the other, what is the problem? Is it not right that he sets the schedules, not us?

And if we think Biblically, then the work which earns our daily bread is of much less true value than the work which bequeaths godly people to the world to serve it. A great career might earn you a stack of cash and a gold retirement trinket at the end (though we trust you also fulfilled your God-given vocation to his glory on the way!). All this is left behind at last. But your family can be a real gift to the world that lasts and lasts - to a thousand generations! Even if your "career" is spreading the Word, ultimately no convert or student can be influenced by you to influence the world like your family can.

Once we are set free from the tyranny of the secularist belief that work is real life and family is an often-unaffordable luxury, we are set free to delight in one of God's greatest treasures and pleasures. I ran some running races after tea against my eldest today. A simple pleasure, but worth more than words can express and more than can be counted in money. Smiles, fellowship, a bond strengthened in a simple way; it's an investment where you can't see the worth growing by observing anxiously, but whose worth is obvious to all with eyes in the end. At times, and often, it takes faith to measure the value of patiently persevering with all the trials of daily life in a family; but the rewards of a Christian family are abundant in this life as well as the life to come.

Interupt work for family? Interupt work for a glorious work, and a true delight.

Marriage goes further than romance

In Western culture, what is love?

If we let the films, books, TV, newspapers, etcetera, reply, then then their answer is: "It is the chase - the getting, the initial thrill of crossing the boundary from acquaintance to romantic intimacy". Quite a difference from the stories and tales of childhood, where the goal was marriage, followed by "and they lived happily ever after".

Now consider real life. All being well, the "chase" happens once, and lasts something from weeks to months, or perhaps even a year or two. Whereas the marriage should last until death separates - perhaps 50, 60, 70 years.

And that's not 50+ years of chasing and discovering romantic intimacy for the first time. That would be like taking your driving test again every week, or starting primary school again every September. It isn't meant to work that way, and if you take it as your model then you'll find it doesn't work that way.

Western culture's holding up of "the chase" as the ultimate, important, central part of love is a sign of Western culture's slide back to infancy. Marriage goes further, deeper, better than simple romance. It goes that far, and then goes much further. But holding up the first stage as if it were the final goal is a recipe for frustration, and ultimately unfaithfulness, family and societal breakdown... which is what we've actually seen.

The task for Christians is to completely ignore the cultural nonsense and do the task as it is meant to be done, guided by Scripture and not passing cultural fancy. Show a better way, build a better model for our children, be salt and light, and a city on a hill that cannot be hid. When the final standing walls of the decaying culture crumble, that which is built on better foundations will remain. You'll enjoy it much more too.